I'm beginning to see the benefits to blogging. Even though no one reads my blog, it's a place I can vent and let out all the stress and tension I may be going through! With my crazy life, there's always something stressful! There just isn't enough time for me to post as often as I would like to, or as much as I need too!
A little over a month ago, my brother, sisters and I began staying with my mother. she is elderly and quite forgetful and although she is independent enough to do a lot on her own, we felt it best for someone to be with her all the time. She is loving having her children with her, and seems to be doing much better now that we are there to monitor her meds and such.
Tonight for the first time in ages, my husband, children, and I have an invitation to dinner with some friends I go to church with. My husband doesnt know them, so I'm not sure I'm going, but you can bet the boys and I will be there! Great people to spend time with and the food is always good if this couple cooked it!
I started taking Copaxone Saturday, giving myself the injections. It is so easy and even though I'm still a little slow with it, it doesn't take long at all. I know after a few more times, it will be very quick to do. There is no pain involved, and in fact I can't feel the needle at all! There is a little achiness after the injection, but it only lasts a few minutes and it's gone too.
So, for anyone who may accidentally wind up on my blog....I'm just a normal person, with normal things going on in my life! I do love my life though, and although there are stresses and issues to deal with everyday, There is always something to be thankful for and to be happy about. My joy is in the Lord, He is my strength and my salvation. He made this day for me, and I will rejoice and be glad in it!
Monday, July 5, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Wednesday Morning
It's a gloomy Wednesday morning in my little part of the world. Overcast skies and a light sprinkle make me want to curl up and do nothing! I love a good storm, but I'm not overly fond of "yucky" weather.
I'm tired today and I'm not sure if it's an MS thing or if i'm just tired. The symptoms of MS are strange sometimes, and often I'm not sure if what I'm experiencing at any given moment is just me, or if it is the disease. There are meds for the different symptoms, but who wants to take that many meds when the symptoms, while bothersome, are not stopping you from going about your day. (Even if going about your day takes much longer than usual!)
On a good note, my treatment/medicine came in yesterday. You know you've seen these gifts that are in a huge box but when you open it, there is a smaller box inside? Then another and another until you only have a tiny box left to open? That's how I felt opening the package! I opened the delivery box and found a styrofoam cooler. Inside the cooler, the contents were covered in bubble wrap. Under the bubble wrap, was the box of medicine, the sharps container and alcohol swabs, all seperately packed. Not to mention all the freezer packs to keep it all cool!
I signed up with Shared Solutions as soon as I had a diagnosis of MS. They have been wonderful and are never impatient, even when I have a "I was just wondering..." sort of question. They will be sending out a nurse on Saturday to train me to use the Autoject pen for copaxone as well as how to inject without it. I've never given myself an injection before, so I'm a little nervous, but I'm sure I'll do fine once I'm used to it!
On a joyful note, we are still in revival at church. It's been going for a while, but the services are amazing! I love going to church, and even though I may be tired sometimes and it feels like a struggle to get ready to go, I'm always glad that I made it. There is such a comfort, peace and joy that comes from being in His house, in His presence, spending time with others who believe as I do!
I'm tired today and I'm not sure if it's an MS thing or if i'm just tired. The symptoms of MS are strange sometimes, and often I'm not sure if what I'm experiencing at any given moment is just me, or if it is the disease. There are meds for the different symptoms, but who wants to take that many meds when the symptoms, while bothersome, are not stopping you from going about your day. (Even if going about your day takes much longer than usual!)
On a good note, my treatment/medicine came in yesterday. You know you've seen these gifts that are in a huge box but when you open it, there is a smaller box inside? Then another and another until you only have a tiny box left to open? That's how I felt opening the package! I opened the delivery box and found a styrofoam cooler. Inside the cooler, the contents were covered in bubble wrap. Under the bubble wrap, was the box of medicine, the sharps container and alcohol swabs, all seperately packed. Not to mention all the freezer packs to keep it all cool!
I signed up with Shared Solutions as soon as I had a diagnosis of MS. They have been wonderful and are never impatient, even when I have a "I was just wondering..." sort of question. They will be sending out a nurse on Saturday to train me to use the Autoject pen for copaxone as well as how to inject without it. I've never given myself an injection before, so I'm a little nervous, but I'm sure I'll do fine once I'm used to it!
On a joyful note, we are still in revival at church. It's been going for a while, but the services are amazing! I love going to church, and even though I may be tired sometimes and it feels like a struggle to get ready to go, I'm always glad that I made it. There is such a comfort, peace and joy that comes from being in His house, in His presence, spending time with others who believe as I do!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Big changes
I just found out a few hours ago that my husband will be going back to working construction away from home. This comes with mixed feelings and a little worry. I am trusting in God and my husband that this is the right decision, but I can't help but have some concerns.
Let's start with the concerns and get them out of the way.
1. He'll be gone. I miss him when he is gone. He is my best friend and I don't want him to be gone for that long.
2. It's been 4 years since he's worked away from home. He isn't used to working 7-12's anymore. I worry that he'll make himself sick by working so much.
3. It's a dangerous job, not as much as some, but more than others. I'll worry about his safety while he is gone, as well.
4. Did I mention that he'll be gone and I will miss him terribly?
The good things about him working off:
1. The money. Enough said about that.
2. He is already happier knowing that he won't have to keep working at his current job.
3. He'll be working with a good friend whom I love dearly.
4. He'll be doing work that he enjoys.
All in all, I'd much rather have him home, but there are no jobs here at home that will pay what he makes now, other than the job he has now. He is miserable in this job so I know the new job will be better for him mentally. We can get our bills paid off and get completely out of debt within a year or so. This is what he wants to do, and I will support him in this decision. God is good and is always in control. God does NOT make mistakes! I will find my comfort and rest in Him as he renews my joy each day!
Let's start with the concerns and get them out of the way.
1. He'll be gone. I miss him when he is gone. He is my best friend and I don't want him to be gone for that long.
2. It's been 4 years since he's worked away from home. He isn't used to working 7-12's anymore. I worry that he'll make himself sick by working so much.
3. It's a dangerous job, not as much as some, but more than others. I'll worry about his safety while he is gone, as well.
4. Did I mention that he'll be gone and I will miss him terribly?
The good things about him working off:
1. The money. Enough said about that.
2. He is already happier knowing that he won't have to keep working at his current job.
3. He'll be working with a good friend whom I love dearly.
4. He'll be doing work that he enjoys.
All in all, I'd much rather have him home, but there are no jobs here at home that will pay what he makes now, other than the job he has now. He is miserable in this job so I know the new job will be better for him mentally. We can get our bills paid off and get completely out of debt within a year or so. This is what he wants to do, and I will support him in this decision. God is good and is always in control. God does NOT make mistakes! I will find my comfort and rest in Him as he renews my joy each day!
Friday, June 25, 2010
A Beautiful Woman
Yesterday, I started reading "Beautiful in God's Eyes" written by Elizabeth George. In this book she explains what is considered a beautiful woman in God's eyes. In today's world, we look at outward appearance's and, whether we realize it or not, we automatically "judge" a person by that quality. Our subconscious automatically tells us who is worth spending time with, based on it's perception of how they look. However, God doesn't care what we look like, if we sing well, if we are graceful, or if we have any other talent that others can see. He is only concerned with what we "look" like through His eyes.
Proverbs 31:10 says "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far beyond rubies." and then it goes on to tell everything that a virtuous woman should be. In reading those scriptures last night, I realize how far from God's ideal I really am. I consider myself to be a good wife, and I try to do something everyday that lets my husband know that I love and respect him. I am loyal, faithful, supportive, but.....
I can also see that my housekeeping skills, or lack of, are not just a reflection on me, but also on him. My apparent lack of financial management is another area I so desperately need to work on. I could do so much better on both of those areas and that has become my new goal. Instead of complaining about the condition of my home, I will be thankful that I have a home. Instead of being unhappy because there is never enough money for something "extra" for myself, I will be thankful that our bills are paid and we have food to eat (even if we have to eat sandwiches a few times a week :-) ).
In today's circumstances, it may be hard for us to become the Proverbs 31 woman, but it is not impossible. neither can we become her over night or even over the course of a year. It takes time to become who our husbands need and who God wants us to be.
Does that mean that we have to be perfect all the time? I hope not! After all we are human and we will burn dinner, or yell at our kids or get aggravated with our husbands. It's life, it happens. But how we handle these things and how we respond is within our control. There is no doubt, however, that it will take me a while to develop that control!
Proverbs 31:10 says "Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far beyond rubies." and then it goes on to tell everything that a virtuous woman should be. In reading those scriptures last night, I realize how far from God's ideal I really am. I consider myself to be a good wife, and I try to do something everyday that lets my husband know that I love and respect him. I am loyal, faithful, supportive, but.....
I can also see that my housekeeping skills, or lack of, are not just a reflection on me, but also on him. My apparent lack of financial management is another area I so desperately need to work on. I could do so much better on both of those areas and that has become my new goal. Instead of complaining about the condition of my home, I will be thankful that I have a home. Instead of being unhappy because there is never enough money for something "extra" for myself, I will be thankful that our bills are paid and we have food to eat (even if we have to eat sandwiches a few times a week :-) ).
In today's circumstances, it may be hard for us to become the Proverbs 31 woman, but it is not impossible. neither can we become her over night or even over the course of a year. It takes time to become who our husbands need and who God wants us to be.
Does that mean that we have to be perfect all the time? I hope not! After all we are human and we will burn dinner, or yell at our kids or get aggravated with our husbands. It's life, it happens. But how we handle these things and how we respond is within our control. There is no doubt, however, that it will take me a while to develop that control!
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Beginning....
I've never had a blog before but am feeling somewhat reflective about life in general and current events in my life, in particular. Where to start? I guess by telling you a little bit about who I am. I am a 45 year old woman married to a terrific man. I have 2 sons from my first marriage who are teenagers and both are now driving! Those boys are my heart and breath and without them I would be lost. I am an Apostolic Pentecostal and I have the most wonderful pastor and church family a person could ask for. We just moved into our new church building in May and it is absolutely beautiful! In March this year, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and am also starting treatment for that the beginning of July. One other hat I wear is part--time caregiver of my mother.
On to the reason I started this blog. I feel like my life of true joy began at 10:15 a.m. on Sunday, January 17, 2010. It had been 12 years since I had attended church anywhere. God had been dealing with me for some time to come back to Him, and on that Sunday morning I gave my life back to God and was renewed in the awesomeness of Holy Ghost. Now, I've always been a happy person. Even when things aren't going well, I can find something to laugh about and a reason to smile. However, until I let God have control of my life again, until I chose to live my life for Him, joy was missing. Although I may have been happy, I was not joyful and there wasn't a lot of meaning to my life. Suddenly, everything was beautiful, people I didn't like before were suddenly great to be around, and I loved everyone! It's amazing the difference God makes in our lives when we let Him. It's been 6 months since then and although my life is far from perfect, I have a joy that is far beyond description, a comfort that is always present, and a love that I cannot fathom.
On to the reason I started this blog. I feel like my life of true joy began at 10:15 a.m. on Sunday, January 17, 2010. It had been 12 years since I had attended church anywhere. God had been dealing with me for some time to come back to Him, and on that Sunday morning I gave my life back to God and was renewed in the awesomeness of Holy Ghost. Now, I've always been a happy person. Even when things aren't going well, I can find something to laugh about and a reason to smile. However, until I let God have control of my life again, until I chose to live my life for Him, joy was missing. Although I may have been happy, I was not joyful and there wasn't a lot of meaning to my life. Suddenly, everything was beautiful, people I didn't like before were suddenly great to be around, and I loved everyone! It's amazing the difference God makes in our lives when we let Him. It's been 6 months since then and although my life is far from perfect, I have a joy that is far beyond description, a comfort that is always present, and a love that I cannot fathom.
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